When we gonna get to Goshen? Gary is really hating his job. He's getting churly and snappish at home and it reminds me so much of what a pisspot I was behaving like when I worked for the 'Belt. Beyond encouraging him to take time off, tell off his boss, or find a new job altogether, there's nothing I can do. Well really, there is nothing I can do other tahn be supportive. I'm his wife, not his champion or life-fixer. I have to keep telling myself that because I always feel the need to fix things. The White Knight syndrome, hee hee. Of course, he's still there because well, it's a job and it pays well, and it's darn scary to look around for the new gig when you've got the old comfortable gig. That's what kept me at the old job for about 5 years after I should have left. That and I was so compelled to continue the work that I got a degree in. Now, who cares, other than the fact I am so completely overqualified it isn't even funny. At least I'm getting paid on time now. Let's hope that continues. Sometimes I feel like I work 24/7 though what with this job and the MK and the house. I guess that's what adulthood is all about, and then why would I want to throw kids into the mix when I'm already pretty worn out? I poked Gary the other night and asked him if ever considered getting fixed and he said he wasn't broken. We had a giggle and I told him how urpy I was feeling and since I started the new bcp . . . he just groaned. I don't think he would be weird or angry if I did catch preggers but I would be terribly disappointed. I feel like I've waited so long for this good sweet life and a yowling brat would take all that away from me. But then, we make plans, and God laughs. Sigh. I'm eating a really good roast beef sammich that has cream cheese on it. Not kosher at all. Gads, I need to get a passover card for Ross and Laura. I don't know how I manage to get anything done, I'm so disorganized. And I just flat-out don't do things I'm supposed to do. procrastination? Beyond that. I must get all the mail out tonight and make phone calls and charge my damn phone. And pay attention to Gary. My mom would say something like that the woman's lot in life. Gary really dislikes my mother, I think. I mean, not just finds her annoying, but really dislikes her. He wonders how I managed to survive so long with her without prozac, especially when its so obvious that she needs it too. My father just exasperates Gary because he (my father) won't follow doctor's orders and stuff like that. They're so different from Gary's parents, who seem pretty low key by comparison. Their low-keyness actually makes me nervous. It's like a calm before a storm, because if my parents were behaving like that some weird shit was about to go down. Bleah blech bleash. Stuff to do, don't wanna do it
|