Burn Baby Burn! (It's a Disco Inferno!)
Friday, Dec. 15, 2006 at 8:04 a.m.
On this day in 1952, fashion photographer George Jorgenson has a Danish surgeon remove his various naughty bits, in the world's first sex-change operation. George emerges in New York as cabaret actress Christine Jorgenson.
Well, truthfully, he didn�t exactly have a sex-change operation, as he only had his male naughty bits removed . . . he didn�t have female naughty bits constructed for him. I think he went on hormone therapy, though.
Christ, why do I know stuff like this? My brain is filled with trivia, but it�s not even the kind of trivia that could win me a few grand on Jeopardy!. Perhaps on Millionaire, but they don�t tend to ask question of an �X-rated� nature on that show, as my high school Latin teacher would say. Sometimes we played Trivial Pursuit� on school bus trips, and she would consider a question like what is removed in a hysterectomy to be �X-rated�.
I tell you what, one thing that�s removed in a hysterectomy is the ability to generally function and the ability to lose that swelly belly created by the surgery itself. It�s been 10 months (ten months today, actually) and I still have numb spots on my belly near the incision. I am also about as scatterbrained as a churchmouse on meth.
Speaking of scatterbrained, work is going to get a little crazy here before the end of the year, as the Corporate Powers that Be have decided that they�re paying far too much rent on the space we currently inhabit, and we must move, but for the purposes of budget, we have to move before Jan1. Well, I�m all for saving money, especially if that money translates into a better pay scale for me, and going from a rent of 1 million a year to 100K per year sounds a lot better to me. Of course, everyone�s going batshit about the computer servers and phones being down and how we�re going to accomplish providing customer service and frankly, I don�t give a rat�s ass because I�m not paid enough to figure that shit out. I�ll show up where they tell me to. If I don�t have a phone, well, someone else has to fix that problem.
So the office has been in a flurry of packing to move across the parking lot. The bad news is that my group has to go back to sharing cubes. Well, whatever. As long as I can have a little cubby space and room for my 2 plants and my little fishy bowl. What pissed the hell out of me was this conversation:
Valkyrie: So once we get moved, A will be back from her holiday?
Passive Aggressive Bitch Boss: Yes.
Valkyrie: Then she�ll go back to day shift, correct?
PABB: Yes.
Valkyrie: So I�ll have my Tuesdays off again, right?
PABB: No.
Valkyrie: No?
PABB: The new schedule has everyone working 36 hours per week.
Valkyrie: pause Can we see this new schedule?
PABB: No.
Valkyrie: pause And why not?
PABB: Because I don�t want you to see it until we�re moved into the new space and everyone�s on the same page.
Valkyrie: pause One more question. Why are you such a passive aggressive bitch?
No, I didn�t ask the last question. I was trying to keep myself from punching her. We can�t see the schedule until we�re already living it? If she puts me on weekends or 2nd shift, I won�t restrain from punching her in the face. Hubster�s already looking into how we can get back on the insurance at his work and I�m looking (passively) for another job. Damn, but I like working here. Why does there always have to be someone screwing up the works?
Anyhoo, I went and packed prematurely but that�s okay � I wanted to cull some crap out if we�re going to be sharing cubes, and I wanted to see just how little I can get away with stashed hither and yon in this cube.
In the big picture, I have it pretty good here at work. As opposed to this fellow:
Well, if that doesn�t give the term ass pirate a different meaning! Here�s the Captain of that slogger:
He looks like a dirty bugger! But is he fit to shovel shit from one place to another?
Well, I guess 50 Cent . . .(or perhaps some other rapper) is all you need to feel the Magic Atmosphere! But can we get some air freshener for that �magic atmosphere�? **gag**