Perverted Innocence and Gutter Brains
Friday, Jan. 26, 2007 at 8:02 a.m.
On this day in 1998, residents of the Japanese town of Ito are attacked by a pack of raving wild monkeys. A total of 26 were injured and had to receive rabies shots. It remains unclear why the monkeys chose to attack.
*belch* Well, why not?
Seriously, I think monkeys get pissed off at us because we have that extra chromosome, and I expect that monkeys get further pissed off when they are used for medical experimentation and light entertainment on Jerry Lewis’ Labor Day Telethon. I’m not sure any self-respecting monkey wants to wear a diaper and a Clark Gable costume and kiss another monkey dressed like Scarlett O’Hara on national television. I sure wouldn’t.
And anyway, click here if you want to experience the Monkey Love. Or at least 12% of it.
I have written three opening statements to paragraphs and then erased them in the past few minutes. I’m about as pithy today as a European Rabbit Flea, and considering that the newly-born male ERFs snatch their newly-born sisters right out of their mother and immediately impregnate them, I’m not sure how good of a comparison it is. To compare myself and my pithiness to an ERF, that is. Poor baby girl ERFs. Not even a minute old and already knocked up. Like Tribbles™.
Why am I even bringing up the incestuous raping of blood-sucking parasites?
I wonder if I’ll get Googled™ for the above question.
I wonder who thought this was a good logo:
I suppose if your brand name is “Worst Hotel”, why not use an image of a flying vomiting elephant? What could be worse?
Yeah, an anthropomorphitazion of a plastic bottle showing me his not-not. Yup. That’s a much worse marketing plan. Another important part of business is realizing that location is everything:
And be careful about how you brand yourself:
But be careful about how truthful your advertising is:
Here endeth the lesson. Ta.